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Testing Fences
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"The
boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; surely I have a
delightful inheritance." Psalm 16:6 (NIV)
Each morning
when I let my dog out he does a lap around the perimeter of our yard and then
comes back to ram his body against the gate, just to see if he can get out of
the confinement we've put him in. He looks over at me as he does it, as if to
say, "Just checking." The other morning I was laughing about what a
silly dog he is. Then it occurred to me that I am not that different from him
when it comes to the fences in my life.
Like my
dog, I have a Master who has constructed boundaries to keep me safe. But I don't
always like those boundaries. I don't understand why they have to be there. Why
can't I just be free to roam where I please, call my own shots, make my own
decisions? Why must there be fences to hem me in?
Like my
dog, I am quick to forget that those fences are there for my protection. And so
I go around kicking them, testing them, pushing against them instead of
accepting them. Instead of trusting, I just feel trapped.
As I
look back over my life, I can see many fences I've tested. When God made me a mother,
I questioned the position I'd landed in. Perhaps I'd be better off somewhere
else, doing something else.
When
God directed us to do whatever it took to get our finances under control, I
longed for the days when I could run free with my credit card.
When
marriage got really, really hard, I wondered if I was meant to be bound to this
one man forever.
When
God called me to homeschooling, I resisted being tied to my home and children,
slow to realize that God placed me there to teach me things I could've never
learned otherwise.
As I've
surveyed the path of my purpose, I've found myself wondering if another path
would be better-if I am truly where I am supposed to be.
It
seems I have struggled with every boundary, pushing against every fence God has
ever erected in my life. Instead of seeing the place He puts me as a reason for
my safety, I dwell on how it inhibits me.
I can
see how those boundaries kept me in a place where He could reach me. And when
the time came, I saw the benefits of those boundaries. Through motherhood, I
learned to be a servant. Through marriage I learned to forgive and accept
forgiveness. Through paying off debt, I learned the blessings of financial
freedom. Through homeschooling I learned to lay down my agenda for His. I am a
better person-and I know God better-through the boundaries in my life.
Have
you struggled with some boundaries of your own? Maybe today you're looking at
the fences in your life and wanting to throw yourself against them instead of
seeing them as pleasant places and trusting that within those confines waits
your delightful inheritance. Maybe you've forgotten that your Master erected
those perimeters for your good.
This
morning a neighbor knocked at our door. My dog had pushed against the fence and
this time it had given way. He had escaped and gone for a romp through our
neighborhood, happy and free, oblivious to the cars that could have hit him,
the dog catcher who would be only too happy to put him in the pound.
The
neighbor brought him back to me and I put him in the fence, this time making
sure the gate was securely latched. He still didn't understand the need for his
fence. But I, his master, do. He just has to trust that I have erected the
fence for his safety, and dwell in his pleasant place. Just like me.
Dear
Lord, help me to stop pushing against the boundaries You've erected in my life.
Help me to instead see those perimeters as existing for my protection and my
good. Let me see where You have me as a pleasant place, no matter where that
might be. I want to stop testing the fences and dwell in Your safe pasture,
trusting and content. In Jesus' Name, Amen.(
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